Halloween Jokes

We asked all the Mykidstime team to come up with their favourite Halloween jokes to share with you, so here’s the worst, goriest, groaniest jokes we could rustle up!

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These jokes are ideal for popping into your child’s lunchbox in the run up to Halloween, or as table favours if you’re having a Halloween party.

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Hilarious Halloween Jokes

Why don’t skeletons ever go out on the town?
Because they don’t have any body to go out with

What did one ghost say to the other ghost?
“Do you believe in people?”

Why do witches use brooms to fly on?
Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy

What do you call someone who puts poison in a person’s corn flakes?
A cereal killer

What does the papa ghost say to his family when driving?
Fasten your sheet belts

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What is a skeleton’s favourite musical instrument?
A trom-bone

What do birds give out on Halloween night?
Tweets

What’s a monster’s favourite dessert?
I-Scream

What is a Mummy’s favourite type of music?
Wrap!

What’s a monster’s favourite bean?
A human bean

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What do you call a witch who lives at the beach?
A sand-witch

Where does a ghost go on Saturday night?
Anywhere where he can boo-gie

Why is a ghost such a messy eater?
Because he is always a-goblin’

What are ghosts’ favourite kind of streets?
Dead ends

Why did the skeleton cross the road?
To go to the body shop

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What happens when two vampires meet?
It was love at first bite!

Who was the most famous French skeleton?
Napoleon bone-apart

Why do vampires need mouthwash?
They have bat breath

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What are your favourite Halloween jokes? Leave a comment below and let us know – we’d love to hear from you!