As a mum, do you find yourself constantly juggling a long list of things, from housework to kids to grocery shopping? Do you feel stressed and overwhelmed by guilt and worry about managing it all? Here are my 3 top stress relief tips for mums, guaranteed to save your sanity!
Don’t miss our best content straight to your inbox! Sign up now and get our FREE newsletters packed with fun ideas and things to do with the kids, family-friendly recipes, expert advice, parenting tips and great competitions.
Top Stress Relief Tips for Mums
As a mother, do you find yourself constantly juggling kids, work, shopping, exam pressures (your own or your teenager’s), cooking, cleaning, ironing and all the other stuff that goes along with being a parent?
In fairness, the list of things mums juggle seems endless! That list matters because everything on it is what keeps the “Parenting Worry-Go-Round” spinning in your head.
Parenting Worry-Go-Round
The Parenting Worry-Go-Round inside your head is where you’ll find all the thoughts that make you feel stressed, overwhelmed and weighed down by guilt and worry. (Parenting guilt is huge for us mums.)
In order to escape the spinning thoughts inside our heads, we often try to make ourselves feel good on the outside.
- We might get our hair done and go on a night out with the girls.
- If you can find someone willing to look after the kids for a couple of days (sisters, aunties, grannies are usually the first port of call — we love you all dearly), you might get a weekend away with your partner, with a massage thrown in for good measure.
- When summer hits, you may get a sun-filled family holiday.
We always feel brilliant doing these things, but the problem is the feeling doesn’t last, because all the things you’re trying to escape from travel with you inside your mind. They’re called your thoughts.
There’s no escape from the thoughts inside your head — they’re with you 24/7, 365 days a year, and that’s a fact.
You can distract yourself for sure with nights out and weekends away, but as soon as you return from the break, all those racing thoughts come flooding back to the front of your mind, and you find yourself back on the Parenting Worry-Go-Round, spinning even faster.
You may also enjoy How To Be a Better Parent and Look After Yourself for the Kids’ Sake
Learn How Your Mind Works
Real escape comes from learning how your mind works, because how you think about the thoughts inside your head dictates how good or bad you feel day to day. More importantly, it dictates how long those good or bad feelings stick around and affect your mood.
There are times when mothers tend to focus on the bad stuff. We can make ourselves feel like terrible mothers, sisters or friends simply by remembering something that happened a month ago, or longer.
The internal “Nagging Committee” has a field day with this kind of overthinking. It triggers old thoughts to come flooding back to the front of your mind, along with the negative feelings they first created, and you end up feeling bad all over again.
This can make you give yourself a hard time inside your own head, and the bad mood persists.
This type of thinking soon leaks into family life, because as the racing thoughts spin you faster and faster on the Parenting Worry-Go-Round, all the bad feelings build up and up, and eventually you find yourself losing it over the smallest of things.
We’ve all been there, haven’t we?
This is how powerful your thoughts are, and we’re brilliant at overthinking the bad stuff — so it’s time to get just as good at thinking about the good stuff!
Prioritise Time For Yourself
No matter what stage of motherhood you’re at, taking care of yourself isn’t just a good idea — it’s essential. Seriously, it’s a must. Real escape starts with prioritising time for yourself, because relaxing and rethinking genuinely makes family life easier.
When you start taking control of the Nagging Committee inside your head, you can stop making yourself feel bad. You can stop the guilt, stop the worry, and reduce the stress. The knock-on effect this has on your kids and partner is just like a cold — highly contagious.
Remember, this isn’t about never feeling guilty, stressed or bad, or never having an argument or raising your voice at the kids, your partner or the dog — the reality is, that’s life.
This is about being in control of the Nagging Committee inside your head, so you’re not making yourself feel bad for longer than necessary. That means a happier person, and a happier mum.
You may also enjoy 10 Quick Ways for Busy Parents to Reclaim Some Me-Time
My Top 3 Stress Relief Tips For Mums
These 3 stress relief (and sanity-saving!) tips will help you do exactly that. Use them daily — they’re free, easy to do, and I promise they work. I have two girls, and I use these on a daily basis.
#### #1. Stop Overthinking The Bad Stuff
Once is enough to make yourself feel bad about anything, so stop belittling yourself and beating yourself up with the parenting guilt stick inside your head.
You know the way you make your best friend feel good about herself when she’s giving herself a hard time about something?
What would happen if you started thinking about what a good mother, sister and friend you actually are, and started talking to yourself the way you do to your best friend — with the same encouraging, loving tone?
Imagine making yourself feel good about yourself inside your own head, for a change.
#### #2. Do a Mind Dump
Before you switch off the light to go to sleep, do a mind dump. Keep Post-Its and a pen beside your bed. Write down whatever comes into your head — full sentences, single words, whatever is inside your head driving you insane. Get it out of your head and onto that Post-it.
Scrunch it up and aim it towards the bin.
Lights out.
Simple as that.
Give it a go and see what happens — you might find yourself sleeping like some partners do (head hits pillow, passes out, snoring within five minutes, doesn’t hear a thing).
#### #3. Stop The Nagging Committee Inside Your Head
There’s way too much going on in there, and it’s too loud and noisy. It’s time to slow down your thoughts so you can mind-dump the thousands of thoughts making you feel bad (yes, there really are thousands of those useless thoughts going on at any one time) and make room for the thoughts that make you feel good instead.
Five minutes is all you need.
Years into this parenting adventure, I’ve discovered a calm mind and a relaxed attitude are every parent’s best friend, no matter what age your kids are.
Good luck with the tips. I hope reading this has inspired you to try them and get yourself off that Parenting Worry-Go-Round!
You may also enjoy Why Creating Healthy Boundaries is Essential For Kids
Over to you now. Are you going to give these stress relief tips a go? What works for you? Share your thoughts in the comments below.
Frequently Asked Questions
How much time do these stress relief tips take?
Very little. The mind dump takes a couple of minutes before bed, and quieting the “Nagging Committee” only needs about five minutes a day. They’re designed to fit into an already busy mum’s routine.
Do I need any special equipment?
No. All you need is a pen and some Post-its (or any paper) beside your bed for the mind dump. The other two tips are simply about how you think, so there’s nothing to buy.
Will these tips get rid of parenting guilt completely?
Not entirely, and that’s okay. The aim isn’t to stop feeling guilt, stress or frustration altogether — that’s part of normal family life. The goal is to stop those feelings lingering longer than they need to, so you recover faster and feel like yourself again sooner.
Can I use these tips even with very young kids?
Yes. These tips work regardless of your children’s ages, from newborns to teens, because they’re about managing your own thoughts rather than changing anything about your kids or your routine.
Related Articles
- How To Be a Better Parent and Look After Yourself for the Kids’ Sake
- 10 Quick Ways for Busy Parents to Reclaim Some Me-Time
- Why Creating Healthy Boundaries is Essential For Kids
Before You Go
If this article struck a chord, take a moment to bookmark it or save it somewhere handy — it’s the kind of thing that’s worth rereading on a hard day. And if you’d like more real-talk parenting tips like this delivered to your inbox, sign up for our free newsletter for weekly ideas, advice and things to do with the family.
