They grow up so fast. One minute you’re deep in nappies and night feeds, the next you’re navigating homework and play dates — and somehow the years in between seem to vanish. Award-winning blogger Tric from My Thoughts on a Page reflects on what it really means to enjoy them while they are small.
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Mother to a Baby
“Enjoy them while they are small.” If you’re a parent of young children, you’ve probably heard this more times than you can count — and maybe it’s made you think, guiltily, “Oh my goodness, time is flying, I’d better start enjoying them!”
I can confidently say that advice has never had that effect on anyone in the thick of it. When you’re managing young, unpredictable whirlwinds whose happy mood can vanish in an instant, “enjoying them” is often the last thing that feels possible.
The people offering this advice usually aren’t really talking to you — they’re talking to themselves, wondering aloud, “Where did the time go?” But for you, right now, time hasn’t gone anywhere. It feels like it has stopped completely.
There are nappies, feeds, baths, crying fits, colic, other children to mind, and a mountain of housework. The small, precious moments — a snuggle, a smile — can get lost in the sheer volume of it all.
You may also enjoy How Time Flies By When You Become a Parent.
The independent person you were before children can start to feel like a distant memory. Life is tiring, and that’s completely normal. Being a mother is deeply satisfying, but the early years — in my experience — aren’t always “enjoyable” in the fun, relaxed sense of the word.
So when other mothers who’ve clearly walked this road tell you these are “the best days of your life,” it can feel baffling. Is it some kind of selective memory that comes with time?
I remember wanting to scream when people said those exhausting early years were the best of my life. I’d smile and nod, while inwardly thinking: Did you go out last night? Do you have a life outside this house? Did you sleep? Did you even get a shower this morning?
You may also like How to Survive the First 6 Weeks with a New Baby.
My Mothering Is Different Now
I’m well past those early, exhausting days now — the days when your children followed your every step and someone was always in your arms.
These days, my mothering looks completely different. I spend time with my children, share meals, chat, and genuinely enjoy their company. I can go out when I want, and I’m often up and about in the mornings before anyone else surfaces.
I’m still their mother, but the shape of it has changed. Recently, my son didn’t come home from college for the weekend, and my eldest went away too — my big family suddenly halved. The house went quiet, and the dinners I cooked were far too big for the smaller crowd they were meant to feed. I had time, all to myself.
I’ve been a mother for more than two decades. I’ve raised my own children and minded others besides. I’ve carried little ones for what feels like most of my life, listened to their play, sat them down to eat, read countless stories, and soaked up more hugs and cuddles than I could ever count. For a long stretch of my life, that was simply who I was: a mother to small children.
I Miss Them
Now that I finally have the time to stop and reflect, I find myself missing those mothering days more than I expected. I haven’t forgotten how hard they were — but I can see now everything I nearly missed while I was in the middle of it.
That little smile. The hug. The giggle. A tiny finger wrapped around mine while I fed them as babies. The delighted screech from the cot each morning when I walked in. The small head resting on my shoulder, worn out after a busy day, as I carried them to bed.
Sitting in my quiet house now, with my children busy building their own lives elsewhere, I look back and know: those were good days. Precious days. And I miss them.
So to anyone in the thick of it with little ones right now — hang in there. In time, those small ones will be as tall as you are. Your hands will be free, your bed will be your own again, and you’ll have time to sit and remember. When that day comes, you’ll likely find yourself remembering the hugs, the kisses, the tiny hands — and wishing, just a little, that you’d taken more time to enjoy them while they were small.
This post is by award-winning blogger Tric Kearney, a stay-at-home mum from Ireland. Tric has a passion for writing, among other things, and shares her reflections on her blog, My Thoughts on a Page. You can also follow Tric on Facebook and Twitter.
You may also like 10 Positive Parenting Tips Every New Parent Should Know and 41 Reasons You Know You’re Mom to a New Baby.
Over to you! Do you look back now and wish you’d enjoyed them more while they were small? Let us know in the comments below.
Frequently Asked Questions
Why do people say “they grow up so fast” to parents of young children?
It’s usually less about giving advice and more about the speaker’s own experience — parents further down the road often feel surprised at how quickly the years passed, and want to gently pass that perspective on, even if it can feel frustrating to hear in the middle of exhausting early days.
Is it normal not to “enjoy” every moment when children are small?
Yes, completely normal. The early years of parenting are often physically and mentally demanding, and finding the day-to-day genuinely enjoyable in the moment isn’t always realistic. Looking back fondly later doesn’t mean the present has to feel that way too.
How can I feel more present with my children when life feels overwhelming?
Small, low-pressure moments — a cuddle, a shared meal, a few minutes of undivided attention — tend to matter more than big gestures. It also helps to be kind to yourself; surviving the tiring days is its own kind of success.
Related Articles
- The Last Time Poem
- How Time Flies By When You Become a Parent
- How to Survive the First 6 Weeks with a New Baby
- 10 Positive Parenting Tips Every New Parent Should Know
- 41 Reasons You Know You’re Mom to a New Baby
Save This for Later
If this piece struck a chord, take a moment to bookmark or share it — it’s the kind of read that’s worth revisiting on the harder days, and again once the house goes quiet.
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