60 Hilarious Halloween Jokes for Kids

Jill Holtz

September 10, 2021

halloween jokes for kids

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Do you have a joke-loving child? Are you looking for jokes for Halloween that you know are safe and age-appropriate? Or maybe you like to make your son or daughter giggle with a note in their lunch box? We’ve compiled 60 hilarious Halloween jokes for kids that you can trust them to tell in public!

Hilarious Halloween Jokes for Kids

This list of 60 fun, clean Halloween jokes for kids are safe for kids aged 7+ and, in fact, they are totally fine for younger kids (although they might not understand some of them!)

The jokes do include ghosts, witches, vampires and skeletons, so just bear that in mind, but jokes are also a good way of reducing fears.

Why not put a joke in your child’s lunch box every day in the run up to Halloween?

Ghost Jokes for Halloween

ghost halloween joke

Ghost Jokes for Halloween

Q: What is a ghost’s favourite fruit?
A: Booberries.

Q: What do you call a spirit who gets too close to a camp fire?
A: A toasty ghosty.

Q: Which type of trousers do ghosts wear?
A: Boo-Jeans.

Q: What do ghosts eat for dinner?
A: Spook-etti

Q: When does a ghost eat breakfast?
A: In the moaning.

Q: Why was the ghost such a messy eater?
A: Because he was always goblin’.

Q: What do spirits send their friends while on holiday?
A: Ghostcards

Q: Where do spirits go to send their post?
A: The ghost office.

Q: Which type of tree do ghosts like most?
A: Ceme-trees.

Q: Which room do ghost houses never have?
A: The living room.

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Werewolf Jokes for Halloween

Q: Who are cousins of the werewolf?
A: What-wolf and When-wolf

Q: Where do werewolves store their things?
A: In a were-house

Q: What do werewolves read to their children before bed?
A: Hairy tails

Q: In what city do most werewolves live?
A: Howllywood, California

Q: What do you call a werewolf with a fever?
A: A hot dog.

Q: What do you call a werewolf that uses bad language?
A: A swearwolf

Q: How do you make a werewolf laugh?
A: Give it a funny bone.

Q: What happens when you cross a werewolf with a cat?
A: You have to get a new cat.

Q: What time is it when a werewolf sees your dinner?
A: Time to get a new dinner.

Q: How do you know that a werewolf has been in your fridge?
A: There are paw prints in the butter.

Skeleton Jokes for Halloween

skeleton halloween jokes

Q: Why did the skeleton go to the dance alone?
A: Because he couldn’t find any “body” to go with.

Q: Which musical instrument do skeletons play?
A: Trom-Bone

Q: What do skeletons order at restaurants?
A: Spare ribs

Q: When do skeletons laugh?
A: When something tickles their funny bones.

Q: What do you call a skeleton that sits around all day?
A: Lazybones.

Q: Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
A: He had no guts.

Q: Who is the most famous skeleton detective?
A: Sherlock Bones.

Q: Why do skeletons hate winter?
A: The cold goes right through them.

Q: How did the skeleton know it was going to rain?
A: It could feel it in its bones

Q: What do you call a silly skeleton?
A: A numbskull.

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Witch Jokes for Halloween

Q: What kind of makeup do witches wear?
A: Mas-scare-a

Q: What do they teach in witching school?
A: Spelling.

Q: Which of the witch’s friends was good at baseball?
A: The bat.

Q: What do you call a witch with chickenpox?
A: An itchy witchy.

Q: What do you call a cold, evil candle?
A: The wicked wick of the north.

Q: Why did the traveling witch throw up?
A: She was broom sick.

Q: Why do witches ride on brooms?
A: Because vacuum cleaners are too expensive.

Q: What do witches put in their hair?
A: Scare spray

Q: What do you call a witch in the desert?
A: The Sandwich.

Q: What’s the problem with twin witches?
A: You never know which witch is which!

Vampire Jokes for Halloween

Q: What song do vampires hate?
A: “You Are My Sunshine”

Q: Why did the vampire like baseball?
A: Every night he got to turn into a bat.

Q: What did the skeleton say to the vampire?
A: You suck.

Q: Why did Dracula take cold medicine?
A: To stop his coffin.

Q: What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman?
A: Frostbite.

Q: Which building did the vampire visit in New York?
A: The Vampire State Building.

Q: What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
A: It’s a pain in the neck.

Q: What is a vampire’s favourite type of dog?
A: A blood hound.

Q: Which type of fruit do vampires like most?
A: Neck-tarines.

Q: What’s the first thing vampires do in the morning?
A: They wake up.

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Monster and Zombie Jokes for Halloween

Q: What tops off a monster’s ice cream sundae?
A: Whipped scream.

Q: What was the mummy musician’s favourite note?
A: The dead sea

Q: How do monsters tell their future?
A: They read their horror-scope.

Q: Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
A: His ghoul friend

Q: What was the goblin’s favourite book?
A: Romeo and Ghouliet

Q: What does it take to become a zombie?
A: Deadication.

Q: What was the zombie’s favourite party game?
A: Hide-and-go-shriek

Q: Where position did the goblin play in soccer?
A: Ghoul-ie

Q: What do zombies read every morning?
A: Their HORRORscope.

Q: Who did the zombie take out on a date?
A: His Ghoul-friend.

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