My eldest is about to head off to college, so when I first came across this beautifully written piece by Misty Lee Brewer about parenthood, well, let’s just say a box of tissues had to be found.
Parenting is a true journey. At the start, you have no idea what to expect. You spend years figuring out each new stage and how to handle it, and by the time your child is ready to leave home, you realise the time has simply passed in a flash.
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Misty’s Reflections on Parenthood
Misty’s Facebook post went viral, and for good reason. She wrote beautifully about the passing of time and parenthood:
https://www.facebook.com/misty.brewerlee/posts/10101058773612196
When you first have children, everyone talks about the challenges of parenting… the struggles of a baby waking in the night, a toddler who won’t stay in bed, the cost of childcare, injuries from sport… Having to take time off work to collect them from school when they’re unwell, helping with homework, a messy house, the never-ending laundry, the cost of school clothes, packing lunches…
You watch their eyes light up on Christmas morning and try to soak in the magic of those moments. You coach them in sports, rushing to practices and matches, driving them all over the country so they can play the game they love, no matter how exhausting or expensive it becomes.
Life is so busy that you rarely stop to think what the end of those days will look like. It’s not really something you can wrap your mind around. You go into it thinking that eighteen or twenty years sounds like a long time.
Then suddenly hours turn into days… days into months… and months into years.
That little person who used to crawl into bed beside you to watch cartoons suddenly becomes a young adult who hugs you in the hallway as they come and go. And the chaos and laughter that used to echo through your home gets filled with silence and solitude.
You’ve learned how to parent a child who needs you to care for and protect them, but you have no clue how the whole “letting go” thing is supposed to work. So you hold on as tight as you can, wondering how time passed so quickly, feeling guilty that you missed something.
Because even though you had all those years, it somehow doesn’t seem like it was enough.
You ask yourself so many questions…
Did you teach them the right lessons?
Did you read them enough books as a child?
Did you spend enough time playing with them?
How many school events did you have to miss?
Do they really know how much you love them?
What could you have done better as a parent?
When it’s time for them to go, it all hits you like a ton of bricks.
And all you can do is hope, and trust, that they’ll be alright as they make their way into the world alone.
Parenting is by far the most amazing experience of your life, one that at times leaves you exhilarated, and at others leaves you heartbroken. But one thing is certain: it’s never enough time.
So, for all the parents with young children whose days are spent trying to figure out how to make it through the madness, exhausted day in and day out:
Soak. It. All. In.
Because one day, all those crazy days full of cartoons, snuggles, sleepovers, Christmas morning magic, matches, practices and late-night dinners… all come to an end.
And you’re left hoping that you did enough right, so that when they spread their wings, they’ll fly.
You may also want to read The Last Time Poem (but have a tissue ready!)
All I can say to Misty Lee is thank you, for summing up exactly how so many of us feel, and for making us cry, again.
Did Misty’s Words Resonate With You?
If you’re a parent watching your own children grow, chances are this touched a nerve. We’d love to hear from you.
Frequently Asked Questions
Why did this post about parenthood go viral?
Misty Lee Brewer’s post struck a chord because it captures something almost every parent feels but rarely puts into words: how quickly childhood passes, and how the “big” years of parenting can feel both endless and far too short at the same time.
Is it normal to feel emotional as your child grows up and leaves home?
Yes. Feeling a mix of pride, grief, nostalgia and worry as a child becomes independent is an incredibly common experience. Many parents describe it as one of the most bittersweet transitions of family life.
Where can I read more reflective pieces like this one?
MyKidsTime regularly shares personal essays and reflections on parenting from real parents. Browsing our family life section is a good way to find more pieces in this style.
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