Like girls, boys are hitting puberty much earlier than in previous generations, sometimes as early as 9. So if you are parent to a boy, you may be wondering how best to approach the topic? Here are some tips on How To Talk To Your Son About Puberty in Boys:
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As a parent, puberty can be be an emotional time for us, as well as our children. Often we don’t see our children as being old enough to be having “The Talk” but we have to accept that they are growing up. So try and look at the confident young adult that is emerging and view it as any other conversation you would have with your son.
#1. Avoid the Big Talk
Val Mulally, a highly respected parenting coach, advises parents to “Drip Feed” the information. Avoid having one big talk as this can make it seem a bigger more daunting thing.
#2. Try to Relax
Answer with confidence and try to relax – if you are nervous, your son may feel that it is not okay to discuss with you. If you feel awkward then be honest, say, “I will answer your question as well as I can, but bear with me, as no one ever talked to me about this stuff very well when I was a kid!”
#3. Each Child is Different
One child might take the information in their stride, while another might keel over laughing. Be prepared for different reactions if you have more than one child.
#4. Keep Answers Concise
As your son asks questions, answer concisely. Try to avoid using slang words, use the correct language and words. Questions that your son might have about puberty could include growing hair, erections, when their voice will become deeper and wet dreams.
#5. Don’t Underestimate their Knowledge
Your son may already have a level of knowledge on the subject. So bear that in mind when discussing the topic.
#6. Let Them Know Timing Varies
Puberty can hit boys at different ages, so just because their voice hasn’t broken or their body hasn’t changed, doesn’t mean anything. Some boys will need to start shaving early, others won’t grow pubic hair until later.
#7. Talk about Physical Changes
Make sure your son knows that physical changes will come like hair growing and voices breaking. Tell them that this is all part of their bodies transforming into young men.
#8. Have the Chats Sooner Rather than Later
It’s easier to talk about these things before they become awkward, and you certainly want to talk to him before he really hits puberty so he can know what to expect.
#9. Talk about Respect
With puberty in boys come testosterone changes, growing muscles and becoming stronger and bigger. Remind them that they need to be responsible and treat all women with respect and courtesy as they become young men.
#10. Have the Sex Talk
And don’t skirt away from this one either! They may likely be hearing versions of this anyhow from peers, which are probably not completely factual, so it’s better that they know the correct facts as soon as you think they are ready to hear them.
If you’re a mother, you might want your partner to have the sex talk with your son, including about masturbation. But if you’re a single mother, or there’s some reason that their father can’t have the chat then keep the conversation factual and make sure you talk about relationships as part of the sex talk too.
Over to you! Have you any more advice for discussing puberty with boys? Let us know in the comments below.