Gender reveals have become quite a cultural phenomenon, with everything from coloured buttercream and confetti cannons to balloon releases used to announce the news parents-to-be are dying to share. But are gender reveals here to stay, or is this a craze that’s on the way out?
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The blogger believed to have “invented” the gender reveal party came forward more than a decade after her post went viral to say she felt some regret about the whole thing.
Back in 2008, when she was pregnant with her first child, Jenna Myers Karvunidis’ gender reveal went viral following an interview published in The Bump magazine.
In her post, she said:
“A weird thing came up on Twitter, so I figured I’d share here. Someone remembered it was me who ‘invented’ the gender reveal party. I had written about my party on my blog and a parenting forum in July 2008. It was picked up and an interview with me was published in The Bump magazine and the idea kinda spread from there. I’ve got the article framed!
Anyway, I’ve felt a lot of mixed feelings about my random contribution to the culture. It just exploded into crazy after that. Literally – guns firing, forest fires, more emphasis on gender than has ever been necessary for a baby.
Who cares what gender the baby is? I did at the time because I didn’t know what we know now – that assigning focus on gender at birth leaves out so much of their potential and talents that have nothing to do with what’s between their legs.”
The mum of three has mixed emotions about contributing to a trend she once helped make popular. She ended her post with:
“PLOT TWIST, the world’s first gender-reveal party baby is a girl who wears suits!”
Karvunidis has said she doesn’t want to make other parents feel bad about hosting a party, but she’d rather see people move towards simple pregnancy announcements over full gender reveals.
But like many parents, I can’t see that happening any time soon – I’ve hosted my own gender reveal and shared the news of my baby’s biological sex online.
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My Gender Reveal Story
I never planned our reveal – it kind of just happened. My partner and I always knew we wanted to find out the sex of our baby, and our other children wanted to know even more than we did. So after our “big” scan – the anomaly scan around 20 weeks – once we were sure all was well with bump, we asked our sonographer if she could see the sex of our child.
She could, and she was pretty certain too, so after some negotiation between ourselves, we asked for the sex to be written on a piece of paper and placed in a sealed envelope until later that day.
When my partner headed off to work after several attempts at peeking inside the envelope, I had a balloon made at a local shop for a few euro. I handed over the sealed envelope to the lady behind the counter (who was on her third reveal balloon of the day) and within ten minutes I left with a large black balloon filled with confetti, ready to reveal the baby’s gender.
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Later that evening we gathered all our children together and popped the balloon as a family – and, of course, as with any gender reveal involving kids, there was some disappointment.
My little boy, our only boy, wanted a baby brother and cried at the news of another girl. It broke our hearts a little, but in hindsight it gave us months to prepare him for his sister’s arrival, and now he’s the one who’s most besotted with her. He eats, sleeps and breathes his little sister.
So I don’t regret our gender reveal, not even for a second.
I should also mention, I’m fully aware that the sex my kids were born with may be different from the gender they identify with down the line. It’s all just a bit of fun, mostly for the kids, and a way to get the family together to celebrate a new chapter in our lives – so why not?
I’ve been to several gender reveals over the past while, all low-key affairs involving just close family and friends, and each one was just as exciting as the last. Some involved balloon popping, another saw the couple whack a piñata to within an inch of its life (great craic altogether), while another had a custom cake made. Once it was cut, it revealed layers of vanilla cake with the middle layer dyed to reveal the baby’s gender.
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What About Gender Disappointment?
While I’ve always been happy, whether at my reveal or at the birth itself, gender disappointment is a real thing, just as my son and partner experienced. It’s more common than you might think, especially among parents-to-be. Many believe we should feel happy, grateful and blessed no matter what the gender – but there are many reasons and emotions involved, and that’s completely okay.
Years ago, I imagined myself at dance and ballet recitals and other things we tend to describe as “girly,” yet here I am on the sideline cheering on my eldest girl at football in the proudest way you can imagine. Stereotypes can play a role, especially if you’re not a “girly girl” and can’t quite picture yourself playing football or other games once seen as only for boys.
Some people find gender reveals tacky or insensitive, and plenty of parents are simply happy as long as their baby is healthy. I don’t see the craze for gender reveals fizzling out any time soon. If a family wants to share their baby’s sex before they’re born, why not?
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What do you think of gender reveals? Have you had one before? Leave a comment below and let us know – we’d love to hear from you!
Frequently Asked Questions
What is a gender reveal party?
A gender reveal party is a get-together where expectant parents share their baby’s biological sex with family and friends, often through a themed reveal such as a balloon, cake, or confetti popper coloured pink or blue.
Are gender reveal parties still popular?
Yes, gender reveals remain popular with many expectant parents, though the format has shifted towards smaller, low-key gatherings rather than large elaborate events.
Why do some parents skip gender reveals?
Some parents prefer not to place emphasis on gender before birth, feeling it can reinforce stereotypes, or they simply want to keep the moment private and low-key. Others have concerns about safety after high-profile incidents involving reveal props like fireworks or smoke devices.
What’s an alternative to a traditional gender reveal?
Many parents now opt for a simple pregnancy announcement without a gender reveal element, or a small, private moment shared only with immediate family.
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