Good manners help family life feel calmer, kinder and easier for everyone. They are not about making children perfect or formal; they are about helping them understand how their words and actions affect other people.
The most useful manners are the ones children can practise in real situations: saying hello, waiting their turn, thanking someone, listening when another person is speaking, helping at the table or apologising when something goes wrong. Small habits, repeated often, can make a big difference.
Make Manners Practical
Children understand good manners best when they can connect them to everyday moments. Instead of talking about manners in the abstract, point out what they look like in real life:
- Greeting someone when you arrive
- Saying please when asking for help
- Saying thank you when someone does something kind
- Waiting before interrupting
- Holding a door
- Helping clear up
- Saying sorry and trying to put things right
These small actions are easier to remember when children see adults using them too.
Model the Words You Want to Hear
Children copy what they hear at home, in the car, at the school gate and in shops. If you want polite language to become natural, use it yourself as often as you can.
Helpful phrases to model include:
- Please
- Thank you
- Excuse me
- May I?
- Would you like help?
- I am sorry
- That was kind of you
The more ordinary these words feel, the more likely children are to use them without being prompted.
Practise Without Pressure
Some social situations are tricky for children, especially if they are shy, tired or unsure what is expected. A quick role play can help them prepare for moments like meeting an adult, answering the phone, joining a game, visiting someone else’s house or receiving a gift.
Keep practice short and light. The aim is confidence, not a lecture.
Praise the Effort
When you notice good manners, name exactly what your child did well. Instead of a general “good job”, try saying:
- “That was kind to let your sister go first.”
- “Thank you for waiting while I finished speaking.”
- “I noticed you remembered to say thank you.”
- “That apology sounded really thoughtful.”
Specific praise helps children understand which behaviours are worth repeating.
Get your child noticed for all the right reasons! Good and pleasant etiquette in a child is such a wonderful trait in modern society and mastering these simple manners for kids will assist you in how to raise a grateful child.
Here are 40 good manners for kids, that every child (and adult!) needs to know.
Start Teaching These Good Manners for Kids
Manners about more than just saying “please” and “thank you” – although those are essential! Kids should also know how and when to interact with their peers, family and other adults.
We’ve made a list of 40 essential manners for kids to work on at home and in other situations – let us know how you get on!
General Manners in the Home
1. Say “Please” when asking
2. Say “Thank you” when receiving
3. Show respect for others and elders
4. Let others finish before you speak
5. Don’t use bad language
6. Ask permission before touching or taking things
7. Respect your own and other people’s property
8. Return things you have borrowed from others
9. Consider other people’s privacy. People need their own space but also consider their possessions.
10. Clean up after yourself. Help your family out by keeping your room, bathroom, and general areas as tidy as possible
11. Use polite phone protocol.
12. Write “thank you” notes. This is nice when you receive gifts or presents from people.
Practice Manners at Mealtimes
13. Be polite when someone serves you
14. Put away technology at mealtimes and conversations
15. Listen and don’t interrupt when people are speaking
16. Understand the silverware code! Start with the cutlery on the outside and work your way in.
17. Use a napkin and try not make a mess at mealtimes.
18. Close your mouth when eating and chewing – nobody wants to see the contents of your mouth!
19. Ask to be excused before leaving the table
20. Don’t forget to clear your plate and clean up after yourself.
Having Guests in Your Home
21. Open the door for others and greet people with a smile
22. Shake hands and make eye contact when greeting someone
23. Offer to serve people who enter your home
24. Offer to take their coat or facilitate them with a seat
25. Stand up when an elder enters a room
26. A hug or a kiss for a close relative or grandparent is often appropriate
27. Don’t forget to introduce people in your home to visiting guests.
Being a Guest
28. Don’t visit unless you have been invited or agreed that it’s convenient to do so.
29. Don’t assume you can stay as long as you want – establish a time limit.
30. Permission is needed from both parents/guardians if you want to stay over.
31. Offer to help out and assist when you are a guest in someone else’s home.
32. Clean up and tidy after yourself. This is especially true if you are staying in someone’s home for a few days.
33. Don’t forget to say “thank you” at the end of your stay. It would also be nice at this point to reciprocate and invite the person to your home.
Don’t Miss…
Would like your child to be more independent? This list of essential life skills will stand them in good stead for years to come.
General Manners Out and About
34. Say “excuse me” when bumping into someone
35. Don’t put your feet up on seats on public transport or indeed in anyone’s home
36. Put away your rubbish in a bin when out and about. Don’t expect someone else to clean up after you.
37. Offer your seat to an elderly or physically impaired person when in a public place or travelling on public transport.
38. Consider your use of mobile phone when in a public place – don’t disturb other people.
39. Consider the noise level of your portable music when out and about – keep the noise level down.
40. Be kind to the elderly and open the door for them
FAQ
What are the most important good manners for kids?
The most important good manners for kids are the ones they use every day: saying please and thank you, listening, waiting their turn, greeting people, apologising and showing respect for other people’s space and belongings.
What age should children learn good manners?
Children can begin learning simple manners from toddlerhood, but they need reminders and modelling for many years. Keep expectations age-appropriate and focus on steady practice rather than perfection.
How can parents teach good manners without nagging?
Model the behaviour, practise in short real-life moments and praise children when they remember. Gentle reminders work better when children already understand why the manner matters.
What should I do if my child forgets their manners?
Stay calm and give a simple prompt. If needed, talk later about what happened and practise the words or action they could use next time.
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Printable Manners Reminder
A simple manners reminder can help children practise one habit at a time. Choose a focus for the week, such as saying thank you, waiting a turn or greeting people politely, and notice moments when your child remembers.
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About the Author: Louise Kerrigan
